De gustibus non est disputandum

Beauty… what is it really?

I came across a YouTube where a young woman sent an unaltered picture of herself to Photoshop experts around the world with the instructions, “Make me beautiful.” The results were interesting. The video is 2 minutes.

Naturally, people will have their own preferences, and we should be thankful for that. Some men love high heels on a woman, while others adore those who wear flats. Some prefer blondes, while others are attracted to brunettes or redheads. All as it should be.

My favorite kind of woman was always one who could wake up, pull her hair back, and go grab an early breakfast, knowing she looked fine.

A quiet confidence gets extra points, as does modesty, and kindness. There are so many things that may make a woman beautiful. A quick wit, spontaneity, open-mindedness, a nice voice… someone who gets your jokes. I knew a gal who would spit watermelon seeds off the porch when no one else was around. That always made me laugh.

As I woke one morning recently I remembered a woman I knew many years ago. I loved the smell of her breath. She was attractive on her own, but there was something that exceeded that – an uncertain something the French would call “je nais sais quoi.” I liked the way she smelled when she sweated, like a tomboy. There are many things that we may find attractive in another, even unconsciously… and perhaps especially so.

I like a fit woman, yet I have always found a preoccupation with ‘beauty’ to be unattractive. Real beauty is so much more multi-dimensional than this. Intelligence is attractive, as well as competence at any number of things. Is she good with food? Is she clean? Does she garden? Can she bake? Is she forgiving? Does she like to read? Is she a good mother? How does she respond to touch?

Is there a natural chemistry between the two of you? Do you like the same scents? Do you appreciate the same kind of movies and music? Are you spiritually compatible? Do you believe in the same God? Do you know when one is thinking of the other? Are your secrets safe with her?… and does she love you sometimes in spite of them? Does she ever fix a plate for you simply because she knows what you like?

All of these things are way more important than where she falls visually on a scale of 1-10. Beauty, and our appreciation of it, is so much deeper than mere looks.

As for me, I thought the young woman in the video was most beautiful in her original photo, but then I’ve never liked make up. That said, I am glad that different people have different tastes. I expect that women have the same thoughts about men… and I think that is pretty cool. It is all part of the wonder of being human.


Beauty Standards Around The World – YouTube

2:05 – As/Is

Originally posted to Spacebook on 21 March 2020.

“De gustibus non est disputandum” is a Latin maxim meaning “In matters of taste, there is no dispute.”

De gustibus non est disputandum – Wikipedia

One Comment

  1. There were so many things I wanted to add to this, but it was already too long. I hope this will stir thought in others about the things that are truly important in people, relationships, love and life.

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